Appetizers, Managers, and Haiku

The esteemed Jimmy O’Brien will occasionally throw a party.

After one such party’s membership had dwindled, the remaining guests decided to make a trip to the local Applebees to take advantage of their half price appetizers after midnight promotion. I’m not sure if the promotion was local or national, but in any case it was particularly well crafted for New Jersey, where all social events from parties to poker nights to concerts lead to a diner at 2 AM. Restaurant entrepreneurs have recognized this phenomenon and given New Jersey the highest twenty four hour diner to resident ratio in the country.

Our waitress that night did a fabulous job. She was gracious about keeping separate checks for the large-ish group, didn’t get upset when our aimless chatting led us to take forever to decide on orders, was quick about refills, and dutifully recorded special requests, like extra bleu cheese dressing on the order of wings. This was particularly impressive, because as she confided when she introduced herself, this was her first night on the job.

Everything went smoothly until the checks came, and many of us found that our appetizers came to five dollars, more than half price. Politely, Jimmy asked the waitress what was up, and she said she wasn’t sure and that she’d get the manager for us. The manager explained that the deal we’d seen advertised did not include all Applebees locations, and that his establishment offered a notably different deal, half price or five dollars, whichever is higher. Knowing this, we pointed out, might have caused us to order differently. (Notably, even putting the orders on the same check would have brought the amount over the relevant minimum).

The manager insisted that his deal was posted at the entrance, but we checked; it wasn’t. As we paid, our newbie waitress was overly apologetic, as though it was her job to wonder if we were ordering based on a deal advertised on television and to suggest an alternate dining strategy. Worried that the combination of her unsure, apologetic nature and the manager’s bravado would lead her to take the blame for the mix up, we added two things to our payment and tip. The first was a series of haiku thanking her for her service in a poetic and memorable way; the second was a note to the manager defending her first day’s effort.

We hoped both were effective, or at least as effective as anything written on a napkin can be.